Domestic Violence

Domestic violence inflicts damaging effects not only on the abused but the children who witness it. They learn that violence is an acceptable way to resolve conflict and affects the family generation upon generation unless the cycle is stopped. Have you been affected by domestic violence? Please know this is never okay. If this is taking place right now, remove yourself and your children from the home and go to a safe place. There are many Christian and Non-Christian organizations that can assist you in leaving a violent home.

While the abuser is acting out on hurts of the past and needs God’s love and redemption, you are precious and valued, and you were not put on this earth to be abused. Pray your loved one gets the help they need and leave the door open for healing, restoration, and reconciliation. If they refuse to get help and choose to continue to engage in abusive and violent behavior, impose healthy boundaries to protect yourself and seek God. He will show you the next step. If you are truly seeking His heart and not your own personal desires or worldly advice, He will direct you.

Don’t allow yourself to be influenced by the opinion of others even well-intentioned Christian brothers and sisters, who quite often counsel abused women to submit to abusive husbands quoting verses on submission. You are not called to submit to sin. Seek the whole counsel of God …

“Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her.” (Ephesians 5:25)

” Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.” (Colossians 3:19)

“Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7)

“Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;  for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” (James 1:19-20)

“Love does no harm to its neighbor.” (Romans 13:10)

To submit to violence and put yourself and children in harm’s way is to go against the will of God because God’s will never goes against His Word.

Have you or are you engaged in a physically abusive relationship? Please get help and rest assured that you are not alone. Your faithful Father will never leave you and forsake you. There is help for your hurting heart.

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Domestic Abuse

I will sustain You.One out of three women is a victim of domestic abuse. They are everywhere. It could be the neighbor next door, the girl sitting next to you in Bible Study, or a family member close to you. They are very skilled in hiding their bruises and live lives filled with shame.

Because their spirits have been broken, they are terrified to get help for fear their abusers will follow through on their threat to kill them or their children. When they do seek help from their church, they are told to go back home and submit to their husbands. However, they are not giving the whole counsel of God.

The Bible teaches mutual submission in love and reverence to the Lord not a one sided abusive and demeaning tyrant like authoritarian submission that tears down and destroys hearts and families. That goes against God’s very Word which tells us to “Above all else, put on love which is the bond of perfection.” (Colossians 3:14) It also teaches that “Love does no harm to its neighbor.” (Romans 13:10). Nowhere in Scripture does it teach that wives are to submit to abuse.

However, as awful as the abuse is there is a root driving it, and there are reasons why victims allow the abuse to continue. Both are in need of help. But in order for the cycle of abuse to stop only one person needs to change. Either the abuser will get help, or the abused will stop allowing it. God offers healing to all who are hurting and broken. He sees it all. You are not alone and are not without hope. Seek help and stop the abuse.

“Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered. Or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.” (Proverbs 22:24-25)

True wisdom and guidance are found only in the whole counsel of God.

 

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