Kim’s Testimony

Emotional Healing

Emotional pain is the scourge of the heart and soul. Emotional pain eats away at our humanity. Emotional pain is a burden taking away the quality of our life and most assuredly our emotional pain weighs us down. When we are burdened by our emotional pain we need to lighten the burden. When we hurt, we need a way to take some of the weight off our heart and soul. There is a way to lighten our burden of emotional pain. The way to lighten our load is to tune into the upward pulling force of Jesus.

If you let Him, Jesus is always pulling upward upon your heart. If you let Him, Jesus is always pulling upward upon your burden. Jesus, in His love, is always pulling your burden upward toward Heaven. Jesus is now with you and He is now supporting you, guiding you, and giving you hope as He pulls you upward.

In our emotional pain, we need hope things will change. If there is one supernatural ingredient Christ brings to all of us in our pain, it is hope. Jesus did not come to our world to push you down but to pull you up. Now, take your emotional burden and hold your burden out to Him. Hold your burden out so His light and love can shine into your heart. As you hold your burden out in front of you, watch as Jesus comes and places His healing hands of power upon your hurt…and see His light and love pulling your emotional hurt over to Him…lightening your load, lightening your burden, and lightening your pain.

Christian Hope

Many people do not understand why their hope fails, yet in reality, their concept of hope is wrong. That’s why it is of utmost importance to know what true hope is. Christian hope is not dependent on another person, place or thing, but rather dependent on the Lord alone.

It’s not wishful thinking, vague longing, or trying to fulfill a dream, but rather is assured, unchangeable, and absolute.

It’s not determined by circumstances, surroundings, events, or abilities, but rather by what is already secure and promised. And it is not dependent on the stars, luck, or chance but has already been determined and settled in the heart and mind of God for our good and because of His unfailing love for us.

No human being or situation can fulfill all your deepest needs. Both people and situations change throughout our lives.

You may have days of feeling satisfied, but the satisfaction is temporary, the glimmer of hope fleeting. Only God can provide you with the love, acceptance, and security that at the end of the day is at the root of what our hearts are longing for. And God stands ready to meet your deepest inner needs. This is where our true source of hope is. This is His promise to us – Jesus the Anchor of our soul firm and steadfast. He will meet our deepest needs.

Emotions & Relationship Conflict

There is a direct correlation between relationship conflict and negative emotions. We were designed for love and intimacy. Sadly, many of us were not given healthy forms of love. So we enter relationships with baggage full of skewed love systems and unmet needs expecting the other person to meet our emotional needs.

However, since unhealthy people tend to attract unhealthy individuals into their lives who enter the relationship with their own emotional baggage – unmet needs and skewed forms of love expecting us to love them as they think they should be loved – it’s a great recipe for emotional pain and conflict.

People enter relationships with all kinds of learned negative patterns of behavior to deal with relationship conflict.

The truth is we will never be able to enjoy healthy mutually satisfying relationships until we deal with the issues of our own heart. When we can identify the cause of our emotional pain, we can then process the effects they have on our life, and we can stop blaming others, take ownership of our negative feelings and behaviors and stop allowing others to control our emotions. People are not responsible for the way they make us feel.

Understanding and accepting this enables us to let others off the hook and give them permission to take ownership of their feelings and stop blaming us for how they feel. Jesus heals and restores one heart at a time.

True Change

Repeated apologies, promises never to do it again, remorse, tears, pleading for another chance are things repeat abusers say to those they hurt. Whether they are causing harm through emotional or physical abuse, committing adultery, being deceptive, lying, cheating, or are engaged in other destructive behaviors such as addiction, they genuinely feel bad when exposed and confronted and offer appeasement for the moment but nothing changes.

The behavior continues causing pain and destruction at all levels in families and relationships. That’s because God’s word says there is a huge difference between being sorry and repentance, between regretting the wrongs we have committed and committing to change behaviors that bind and hurt others.

Worldly sorrow does not lead to the brokenness and humility needed to get the human heart to a place of genuine Godly sorrow and repentance before a Holy God that produces a desire to change. Worldly sorrow causes the heart to harden and brings forth death in all areas of our lives, while Godly sorrow softens the heart and brings forth life.

If we continue to allow others to appease us with worldly sorrow, then we must understand that things will remain the same. This is called enabling. We can’t change another person’s heart but God can. Release them to God, guard your heart, and pray the Lord will orchestrate whatever needs to take place to produce Godly sorrow in someone who is hurting themselves and others. That’s where true change begins.

Understanding Fear

Fear is a strong emotional reaction to imminent danger – real or imagined, rational or irrational, normal or abnormal. It is a natural emotion designed by God. However, living with a fear based mentality or with a spirit of fear is not from God.

Sometimes fear is real, we get a call in the middle of the night. Those calls are usually never good news. Often, the caller is delivering some bad news such as someone we love has been in an accident. As a result, our hearts are gripped with fear of the unknown. Is my loved one going to survive? We can find out that we may lose our jobs due to layoffs. Or the doctor tells us we have a terminal illness. Most of us will face some of these life issues at some point in our lives. The fear is real. But often times it has no basis in reality. We can fear what has not happened or will never happen. We may be gripped with fear about the possibility of getting sick, getting in a car accident. We can fear rejection and never pursue friendships, job opportunities, relationships, and we can fear failure and never pursue anything

If you grew up in a home where fear reigned, and you didn’t experience love, safety, and security, you might have easily developed a fear based mentality. This abnormal fear cripples and stunts any personal growth or aspirations. It prevents a person from even trying, or leaving bad situations even abusive ones. It can also prevent us from seeking help for fear of what will be uprooted. Fear can also be the driving emotion behind anger. This is bondage, and we need to be set free.

God’s word tells that “perfect love cast out all fear.” (1 John 4:18) It makes sense then that if we are love deficient we are fear based. The solution is to Get God’s love in you. As easy as this may seem, for those who have been crippled in their ability to love and be loved because of the wounds of the past, it is extremely difficult. Only the truth of God’s love can penetrate the hardest of hearts. We can overcome fear through faith in a loving God.

Love Seeks The Highest Good For Another

The greatest human need is for love. It’s a legitimate need placed in us by our creator. When this need is not met it can create a void so deep we go through life trying to fill it.It causes us to crave the approval and acceptance of others and drives us to engage in imbalanced relationships where we attach to unhealthy, emotionally unavailable people who often abuse and mistreat us. We will often compromise our morals, values, and beliefs for fear of losing them.

This creates a vicious cycle of feeling used, devalued, unappreciated, victimized opening the door to bitterness, resentments, unforgiveness, and hopelessness. The only way to stop the cycle is to get a healthy dose of real love – the love of Jesus. Love seeks the highest good for another. Our Savior demonstrated this perfectly at the cross.

We will never be able to engage in healthy relationships unless we receive the fullness of God’s love. Only His love satisfies. If you are desperately seeking the love and approval of those who continually hurt you it may be a sign that you have not encountered the Love of Jesus in your heart where you see yourself as He sees you – A precious child of the Living God.

When you remove barriers that hinder the ability to live in the fullness of His love for you, it will radically change the people you attract and allow close to your heart. You will desire to engage in relationships that honor God, bless you and seek the highest good for others.

Transforming Power

Are you struggling today? The same power that raised Jesus from the grave is inside us. He is our helper, our teacher, our counselor, our friend. We need to know His power. His resurrection power! His redeeming power! Life breathing power! His healing power! He has the power to change lives and restore hearts.

Knowing the power and authority we have in Jesus Christ through the Holy Spirit can break any stronghold, sever anything that holds us captive and in bondage. It can snap the chains of the enemy; lift any barrier hindering our ability to run the race with endurance.

He is the power source that enables us to persevere and overcome any negative experience that has ever happened to us and be healed and set free. Never underestimate the power we have in the Holy Spirit. God’s word declares in 1 John 4:4 that greater is He who is in your than He who is in the world. We are never alone.

The Holy Spirit is always there and will empower us to face, push through and remove anything that harms us, tries to separate us from God and stunt our Christian walk and spiritual growth.

Unhealthy Boundaries

God’s boundaries are everywhere throughout scripture. They separate light from dark, land and sea, good and evil, holiness and unholiness. They also define ownership. In our personal lives, they protect what we value and assign worth to.

God’s word says that we are the temple of the living God. This means that we are precious and of tremendous worth. We belong to Jesus. Sadly, many believers don’t see their value so they allow people to hurt and mistreat them.

Healthy boundaries are essential in establishing healthy relationships. Unhealthy boundaries lead to unhealthy relationships, and broken boundaries result in broken relationships.

People with unhealthy boundaries allow wrongful behaviors that hurt them and others, compromise values to please others, expect others to fulfill all their needs, feel guilty when they say “no,” and feel used, taken advantage of, unappreciated, threatened and victimized by others, they feel responsible for others feelings and allow others to tell them how to think, feel and behave. They also struggle with being afraid to disapprove of others, receiving criticism, or losing the love of others.

When we allow God to heal our hurts and show us the unhealthy ways we have been operating in relationships, we will start to see our value and worth in Him, and we will no longer wish to engage in the negative patterns of behaviors that ruin relationships. He will teach us how to set boundaries to guard our hearts and temples against getting defiled with bitterness and resentment.

God Heals All

Emotional wounds manifest through various negative behaviors – violent rage, severe depression, phobias, low self-worth, perfectionism, controlling, insecurities, emotional dependencies, addictions, etc. But God can heal all!

He restores what is broken, change your destructive thought patterns, and give you an amazing life filled with hope, joy, and the abundant life Jesus came to give God’s people.

All you have to do is ask. He came to heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds.

Do you want to be made well?

No Longer A Victim

Some who have been victimized by a painful past feel fearful, lost, disconnected, broken, without hope, and need comforting.

There are many self-help groups in modern day society offering support for victims. While helpful they often throw a “victim” label on the wounded, and it becomes their identity. Some even take on a victim mentality always positioning themselves as the victim whether real or imagined.

We did not have a choice in becoming a victim but we have a choice in staying one. The bible says “we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.” (Romans 8:37)

No matter what has happened God can heal, restore and set us free from the painful effects of the past. You can rise above having a victim mentality and become a conqueror in Christ. We are not without hope.