Month: October 2023

What Are Boundaries Exactly?

 

In the world around us, physical boundaries are easy to see….. lines, fences, signs, hedges…..these are all physical boundaries. They give the same message….THIS IS WHERE MY PROPERTY BEGINS. As the owner of the property, I am legally responsible for what happens on my property line. Non-owners are not responsible. Boundaries are just as real in the spiritual realm, only harder to see. Yet they serve the same purpose. They protect ownership.

The word of God says that our bodies are the temple of the living God, and His Spirit lives in us. (1 Corinthians 3:16-17)  We have been bought at a price…by the precious blood of Jesus. (1 Corinthians 6:20) Therefore, we belong to Jesus first and foremost, and our identity is in Him and Him alone. Boundaries merely help guard and protect that relationship and our relationship with self and others.

Boundaries also defend us physically, emotionally, and spiritually from intrusive or unwanted dangers. They also make it possible to engage and enjoy mutually healthy relationships because they protect those relationships by setting the course for mutual respect, consideration, and safety.

Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins….leading me to a sense of ownership. Knowing what I own and take responsibility for gives me freedom. If I know where my yard begins and ends, I am free to take responsibility for my life, and it opens us options to pursue the person that God created me to be. It also gives me the freedom to allow you to be who God created you to be and take responsibility for your own life. This takes the burden off both you and me.

When you have healthy boundaries, you guard yourself from giving more than you should and protect you from others taking more than they should.

Boundaries help bring order to your personal world and the world around you and guard against enmeshment and codependency, where you are controlled by others and stripped of your identity in Christ, causing great conflict in all areas of your life.

God’s Word tells us to……” Above all else guard your heart for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23)

How about you? Do you have healthy boundaries? If not, ask the Lord to show you how to put boundaries in place that will guard your heart and help you engage in mutually healthy relationships that are blessed by God.

 

The Most Dangerous lies Are the One We Tell Ourselves

Because with these lies, often you don’t even realize it you’re doing it. And just like with any sin, when you do it so much, you eventually get desensitized to it, losing sight of where you are because of it, and eventually, losing sight of how much you’re slowly changing because of it. Yes, we lie to ourselves a lot, primarily, to justify why we do what we do. Lies like, “My pornography doesn’t hurt anyone…”, “Well, they deserved it”, “I don’t drink that much…”, “We’re just friends”, “I deserve this”…”I’m not hurting anyone”…”I can stop any time”..or “I don’t even care.” Oh, Yes, to me, this is the most dangerous kind of lying. These are the lies that the enemy uses to lock you farther away into darkness, turn you against yourself, God, and others, and if you allow it to continue, separate you farther and farther from the Truth — Jesus.

So I want to ask you, friend, as I asked myself in writing this, are you lying to yourself about certain things? What have you been telling yourself lately? Or over and over again, where you now, almost believe it? Where you would almost get nervous or upset if someone else knew or questioned you about it? What do you KNOW you need to be truthful about, and bring to light? What do you need to let go of, that you just know isn’t right? Maybe it’s something that you just need to bring to God, that you haven’t. Maybe it’s something you need to look in the mirror and tell yourself, or perhaps another person. Whatever it is friend, don’t become callous to it. Don’t allow the enemy to put you in that hardened place, where you begin to change from the inside out because of it.


We can lie to ourselves for many reasons, but I think the biggest one is that we know we need to change some things, but we just don’t know how to start. But God does. HE knows the way out. He has the power, wisdom, and love, to SHOW you the way out. But it starts with you. It starts with inviting Him in. And allowing the Truth to seep in, so He can free you from the lies that the enemy has kept you in.

God has the keys, friend. You just have to open the door and turn on the lights.

@sarah.jean.armstrong